The Box
by Kioko Yasu
Summary: It was almost like the hole was healing. . .


It wasn't real. It just wasn't possible. There was just no way that someone so full of life could now be laying so still in that box. The preacher preached and Sora just starred at her, waiting for her to break out in giggles and say 'Got you!' Any second now. . . why was she waiting so long? Come on, Kairi, enough is enough already. His eyes were burning but he ignored it. He wanted to be the first to point and shout 'Look! She's not dead!' Soon she'd start convulsing with those cute little giggles and her face would break out in a brilliant grin.

People were filing past her. All the island was there along with several people Sora didn't recognize. He guessed they were people she knew before she moved here. She never talked about it much. Sora joined the end of the line. Surely by the time he got up there, she'd have had her fun and would wake up for him. The line moved slow and there was a lot of crying. Sora just stared at the silver hair of the stranger in front of him. Why wouldn't she wake up? This wasn't funny anymore. He was starting to get angry at her. Why was she putting everyone through this? Didn't she know no one could handle losing her like this? What did she think she was doing? When she finally opened her eyes and grinned at him, he was going to give her a piece of his mind. He was going to ban her from kisses, and this time he would hold to it, no matter how much she pouted. He was going to down right yell at her, something he only did when he was really angry. That ought to be enough for her to see how wrong she was to play this stupid joke on all of them. She probably just wanted to get her old friends to come visit, like the tall guy in front of him.

Silver Hair put a rose in the casket, right beside her. She still didn't move. Stupid Kairi. She must be waiting for him. Silver Hair kissed her forehead and whispered something, yet she still kept her poker face. He walked away and Sora stepped forward and waited.

"Come on, Kairi," he whispered when nothing happened. "It's me." Still, she did not move. "It's Sora. I'm the last one in line. You can stop now." Nothing. No twitch or breath or fluttering eye. "Kairi!" he said, gripping the edge of the casket. "Kairi! Open your eyes!" He shook the casket, making her hair shift, the flowers on top shake, and a thorn from Silver Hair's rose prick her arm. She didn't flinch. "Stop it! This isn't funny anymore! Open your eyes! Kairi!" He wanted to shake the casket harder, wanted to tip it over and scare her into moving, but strong arms were around him, pulling him back. He fought against them "Kairi! Open your eyes! Open your eyes, Kairi!"

"Stop it! Sora, she's gone. She's gone, she can't hear you!"

"No! She can't be gone! She can't be! I won't let her go!"

"Get him out of here!"

"You have to. You have to let her go."

He'd been dragged outside before he managed to break free. He whirled around, barely making out Silver Hair through his blurry eyes. "No! She isn't gone! She's not! She-she-" his legs became as fuzzy as his vision and he fell to the ground. "She can't be. . ."

Silver Hair knelt in front of him. "She is, Sora." he said, his voice gentle but his words no less piercing. "All that's left in that box is an empty shell. She's not there anymore. She'll never be there again."

"Then where is she?!" Sora demanded, his voice hoarse and choked from the sobs that were convulsing through him.

Silver Hair was quiet for a moment before one long, slender finger poked Sora in his chest. "She's here. Kairi lives within you now. You won't be able to see her or hear her or touch her, but she's there."

Sora hiccuped and swiped a hand at his eyes, trying to see Silver Hair more clearly. "Kairi's. . . inside me?"

The other man's smile was small and sad, but there as he nodded.

"Who are you? How do you know my name?"

"Lucky guess. She talked a lot about you in her letters. I'm Riku."

Riku. . . Riku. . . She had mentioned a Riku once or twice. He was the only friend she had really kept in touched with from before. "Riku. . . I'm Sora." he said, sticking out his hand.

Riku gave a quiet chuckle but shook his hand anyway. "I wish we were meeting under better circumstances."

Sora swallowed hard as Kairi laying in the casket sprang to mind again and he almost lost Riku in the tears.

"Sora, Riku," A woman said, stepping outside. Kairi's Aunt. "They're putting her in the hearse now. Everyone's heading down to the cemetery."

"We'll be coming." Riku answered for them and the woman retreated into the church. "Do you have a ride?"

"I drove," Sora managed, fighting off the image of them closing the lid and throwing it in the trunk of a car like trash.

"Well, you're in no shape to drive now. Come on, you can ride with me."

Sora let Riku pull him to his feet and guide him to his car. The drive was slow and quiet. He thought about the funeral processions he'd heard about in New Orleans, where they played music all the way to the cemetery. Sora wished they were doing that. The silence was suffocating. Besides, Kairi would have thought it was fun.

Riku cleared his throat. "So, I'm going to be hanging around for a little while. Maybe we can hang out. Maybe try to work through this together."

"Yeah," Sora heard himself say. "Sure."

"Are you carrying the casket to the grave, too?"

He felt his stomach turn over "Yeah."

Riku nodded. "I'll be right there with you. You won't be going through this alone."

The silence stretched for a long time before Sora whispered "Thanks."

The preacher was saying some sort of prayer as they lifted the box from the back of the hearse and carried it to the little stand above the grave. Sora tried not to think about Kairi being in the box or how that box was about to go down into that never ending hole. He would have lost all his strength and dropped it.

The preacher talked some more and then the casket was lowered into the grave. It was like Sora had x-ray vision and could see Kairi's body through the lid. He had a brief vision of her waking up and being unable to get out. He had to turn away as bile rouse in his throat. Riku's hand slipped into his and squeezed. It grounded him. Kairi was gone, that couldn't happen. Nothing could hurt her now. Sora squeezed back and turned to watch as they threw the first shovel of dirt in.

The crowd began to thin as shovel after shovel full of dirt was dumped into the hole. But Sora and Riku didn't move.

"How could this happen?" Sora whispered, eyes dry now. "How could someone's heart just. . . stop?"

"I don't know." Riku answered. His voice was shaky. Sora looked up to find tears running down his cheeks. He'd barely know the man an hour, but Sora was surprised at how much he had been counting on Riku's strength. To see him cry like that. . .

"Hey now," he said, tugging on the hand he still held in his own. "If you keep that up, Kairi'll call you a crybaby."

Riku gave a hiccuped laugh, wiping at the tears with his free hand. "Like you're one to talk, Sora."

Sora found himself smiling. It was a real smile, too. Something he didn't think he'd ever be able to do again. Riku wasn't Kairi, but it felt like he fit somehow. Like he was a stopper for the hole in his heart. He could almost see Kairi giggling as she pushed them toward each other. She was still in his heart, and there was sure to be more pain in the future, but Riku was there. He wasn't alone.

"What are you smiling about?" Riku asked. The tears had stopped, but his cheeks were still red.

Sora shook his head. "How did you know what to say before? About Kairi being in my heart?"

Riku shrugged. "It was the same thing I told her after her parents died. Before she came here."

He nodded, looking to the half filled hole.

"Boys?" They both looked up to see Kairi's Aunt and Uncle. "We're going now. We're having a get together back at our house with some food and drinks. You're welcome to come if you like."

"Thank you." Riku said, shaking the Uncle's hand.

"I'm sorry," Sora blurted out. "For before. I didn't mean. . ."

"It's alright, sweetheart." Her Aunt said. "This has been hard on all of us." She gave Sora's arm a squeeze before they both headed to their car.

"Do you want to go to their place?" Riku asked.

Sora was quiet, watching the hole slowly fill. It was almost like the earth was healing, with Kairi now locked safely away in it's depths. "No. Pizza. I want Pizza."

Riku blinked. "Pizza."

Sora flashed him a grin and pulled him toward the car. "Pizza. There's this great place two blocks from here that Kairi loved. . ."

And so they ate Pizza. They talked. They laughed. They cried. They healed. And Riku never went back to the main lands.

This was all inspired by a scene I'd seen a million times before. But I clicked on an AMV and it had the clip from KHII opening with Kairi laying on the floor of Hollow Bastion. It was only on the screen for half a second but this entire fic bloomed to life. I kind of like it. This is not meant to be Kairi bashing at all. It's more like a real life version of her losing her heart.

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